My truck was broken into last night. I decided I was too drunk to drive last night; I walked home. This morning I found the passenger side window in tiny fragments all over the seat. My things were strewn about the ground. I have nothing of value in my truck, so nothing was taken, but there is now also a hole on the driver side siding.
I was mad. So mad I was choking. So mad that I could not even focus on the world around me. It was like being locked into an infinite loop of anger and helpless frustration. Every time I thought about that moment of stupid realization, I wanted to scream, hit something, and curl up into the fetal position all at the same time. I called the police. They were polite, took my information and told me that they would call later. I suppose it does not surprise me that there will be nobody dealing with this.
Cleaning the truck was awful. The little reminders of glass sprayed all over anything, in everything. The little piece of plastic that had been ripped out of the driver side door, or the garbage bag in my peripheral, taped to my window. Nothing was stolen. My spare key was still there, tossed aside with everything else. This was not an act of theft. No, this was something far worse. This was violence for its own sake. Somebody just wanted to destroy something, and I became the victim of senseless crime.
Then I remembered something I was told once. You can never control the actions of others. All you can control is your own reaction to the situation. And if this can get such a rise out of me, what happens when I am faced with a more dire situation? No, this was a lesson about people. I live in a world that tolerates petty evils. People do these things because they know there are no consequences. Even if I found whoever did it, there would be no justice. I cannot do anything about other people’s behaviors. So I will always have to ensure that I have control of myself. Because that will make the world a better place.
Until next time,